Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Almost Fainting

There are big things happening right now.

Brotherly affection in my house.
A logjam in healing in a far place.
Looming unemployment.

I was praying about the first of these recently
And the verse came to mind that says,
“This kind only comes out through prayer and fasting.”

I don’t fast when pregnant. Nor when nursing.
The nutritional needs for the child make it so, so painful.

But I could not shake the verse,
So I spent 24 hours, from the conclusion of one dinner
To the commencement of the next,
Without eating.

Man does not live on bread alone,
But on every word that descends from the mouth of God.

It was so hard, it brings me to tears just remembering.
I felt faint.

I thought over and over,
This is the level of intensity that I long for things to be made right.

I feel it in my gut, in my body.
I feel it before I eat,
And then, when I started to eat again and felt ill for hours,
Ill like morning sickness,
So ill that I lay in bed and moaned …

Hear this moaning, oh, Lord.
Act on behalf of your people.

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