The March second before Caleb was born,
I read about autism and other disorders,
And fell asleep distressed.
There is so much that can be a challenge in this world.
(My friend assures me that challenges can also be gifts.
I believe her, though I have no desire to test this.)
I woke in the wee hours of March third,
Wondering why Phil was shining a flashlight in my eyes.
With unrelenting morning sickness, I longed to sleep
And forget, for a while, my poor body.
It was not my husband, but the full moon,
Shining down through the slim window of the trailer.
As I fell back to sleep, I heard,
“Don’t worry—he will be strong.”
By light of day, I had relief for my fears.
And a bit of sorrow that this child, too, would not be a daughter.
So I pray for daughters-in-law who will love me very much.
Then I will have my amazing sons
And daughters who will be happy to talk to me.
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