Psychosis

I was talking to a friend once about
Anxiety.
Could you think differently?

“You want to fix this!”

I remembered then the period
When I felt demon-possessed,
When suicide was a daily idea,
When rage took over my thoughts,
Even while a tiny voice at the back of my mind said
“You’re not being rational.”

In short, when I was psychotic.

We figured out, eventually, that wheat triggered me.
Now I know that if I try Ezekiel bread,
Or a beer that I realize, too late, has wheat,
I know that suicide will come to mind
And be more testy for a few days,
But my brain will eventually regulate and I will be
Myself.

I don’t know what hubris would be required
To assume such psychosis doesn’t exist.